Being Single


I didn’t plan to be single at this stage of my life.

My life has taken a detour from the road map of a safe, well-traveled road. Life is messy, and confusing (better known as conventional wisdom). Conventional wisdom gives us some comfort and balance to an otherwise unstable life.

The problem with conventional wisdom, though, is that it often fails. Sometimes we find ourselves on roads far away from our planned paths. Sometimes we end up there by our own choice. Other times, we end up there by circumstance.

I never planned on being a 40-something, single dad. Who signs up to be a single parent?

I do miss physical touch and words of affirmation. But I’m also beginning to realize I don’t have to date or be in a relationship to experience those things. I’m not quite sure what this looks like. I know it doesn’t mean having one-night stands with strangers. But as I continue to walk this path, I’ll figure it out.

I’ve been married, I’ve had my children, and I’ve been in love. Perhaps this truly a time to pursue self-improvement and awareness. It’s a time to discover and cultivate my true self, while also raising the best children I can — molding them into strong women.

Although it goes against the conventional wisdom . . . singleness does not have to be a limbo state where one is waiting to become a couple. Singleness is a viable way of life. The longer I travel this road, the more I realize that being single allows me to live my best, most authentic and most meaningful life.

Most superheroes are single. Perhaps they’re on to something.


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